On July 15, 1988, I came into this world fully-formed, rising from the sea foam and bursting from the skull of Zeus.
But I somehow found myself in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, at the crossroads of Rust Belt decay and Amish country. Raised by pragmatic scientists, I became the first known member of the VanBlargan clan to receive a B.A. in English. Post-college, I worked a variety of odd gigs—trivia game show contestant, writing tutor, competitive Scrabble player, Applebee’s waitress—before landing a position at an educational multimedia publisher.